2003 Hummer H2 Review

Specifications

Tread Lightly? Yah Right.

Want to get noticed? Theres a few surefire ways. The time-tested streaking method always gets people looking, but if youre inching up in years like me youd probably get more laughs than lust, not the optimal result. What about finding a little arm candy to get the women talking and the men jealous? That always works but can cost more than a sports car or really cool SUV. Hey, thats the ticket. Get a really awesome car and then the arm candy comes free!

OK, Im having a little fun with this one but theres often more fact to the scenario Ive staged than fiction. No matter how desperate your need for attention might be, the Hummer H2 is the perfect vaulted pedestal to satisfy even the most ardent exhibitionist. Absolutely everyone looks in your direction no matter where youre going. The notice-me-yellow paint scheme, bright metalwork and radical H1 inspired utilitarian shape assures that. And even if neck-snapping responses from passersby were its only attribute, many would pay the $49,000 plus price of entry. But theres more to this massive SUV than just show.

How about go? Hammer the electronic drive-by-wire throttle and it jumps off the line with confidence, if not neck-snapping velocity. It clicks through the gears without commotion as 316-hp and 360 lb-ft of torque available in its 6.0-L OHV V8 makes light duty of its 6,400 pound curb weight.

Light duty? As if. Even compared to the mammoth H1 the H2 is hardly a lightweight. It hits the scales at just 754 pounds shy of the mighty H1 wagons 7,154 pound curb weight. Also, while the H2s 122.8 inch wheelbase is 7.2 inches shorter than the SUV of SUVs the new model is a full 5.3 inches longer, at 189.8 inches. At 77.8 inches tall, its also 2.8 inches higher than the 175.0 inch H1 wagon.

That sure doesnt sound like an easier vehicle to maneuver around town or squeeze into a tight parking space - that is until you factor in the differences in width. The H1 measures in at 101.0 inches including the mirrors while the new H2 seems relatively narrow at 81.2 inches excluding mirrors. That makes the H2 19.8 inches slimmer than the original. Even if you add 5 inches to each side of the H2 for mirrors it still comes up almost a foot skinnier, a serious benefit in the bush too.

All you need to do to engage low range is push a button on the dash. Its electronic shift transfer case will do the rest, optimizing its throttle programming for better off-road control in the process. Its heavy-duty 4-speed automatic transmission seems perfectly suited to the job at hand, downshifting when needed and upshifting without hesitation. The full-time 4WD transfer case differential allows a 40/60 front/rear torque split when in 4HI, its normal driving position. When in 4HI Locked a 50/50 torque split is achieved by locking the differential - the first time an Eaton electric differential lock has been used in this application. Whats more, press the traction control button when 4HI Locked is engaged and its program modifies to let the wheels spin more freely, optimal in loose dirt and gravel. Need more ride height? Another button will raise the chassis. After all that its off to the races - or at least a monster truck rally.

But wait a minute? As good as all this sounds can the H2 bring honor to the Hummer name by living up to its bigger brothers stellar off-road reputation? In one way it surpasses it. Remember the width stats? The H1 can be extremely difficult to navigate through narrow heavily treed passages. On the contrary the H2 will work better in these circumstances, but only these circumstances. Its 43.6 degree approach and 35.9 degree departure angles are excellent as are its 32.6 inch front and 34.6 inch rear overhangs, but its 9.3 inch ground clearance is not even remotely near the H1s 16.0 inch clearance. With that in mind the H2 doesnt even come close to surpassing the 2002 Toyota 4Runners ground clearance at 9.8 inches. That said it beats the 2003 version slightly by 0.2 inches. So if you happen to hang up the H2 on a tree stump or jagged rock feel confident that the well placed skid plates and underbody shields will probably protect anything vulnerable from damage.

But like all things, simple stats cant quantify true talent. When the road gets rough the H2 is truly in a class of few. It can scale a 60% grade without breaking a sweat and then negotiate a 40 percent side slope. While I didnt get the chance to take it up a 31 degree vertical, the limited 4×4 testing I did manage to fit in proved positive. Off the pavement the H2 felt confidence inspiring, ready to tackle anything that dared cross our path.

On pavement driving was another story. If youre looking for Acura MDX or BMW X5 handling keep driving. The Hummer, with its hydroformed modular 3-section fully-welded ladder-type frame, is optimal for off-road expeditions but just isnt capable of on-road gymnastics like these car-based machines. That said driven at sensible speeds it proved quite comfortable and adequate through the corners. Its 17-inch alloy rims are wrapped in BFGoodrich LT315/70R17 tires, a good on and off-road compromise. Its independent front suspension and 5-link variable-rate coil setup in the rear complimented the long wheelbase for a smooth and relatively comfortable ride. My test vehicle came equipped with the optional self-leveling rear air suspension package, even better. All in all the H2 was easy to drive through congested city traffic and a simple procedure to parallel park - up over the curb (12-inch maximum) and down the other side if all else fails.

Just like giant highway trucks the H2 incorporates engine braking to minimize break fade and wear while descending steep slopes. As expected it incorporates 4-wheel disc brakes plus standard 4-channel ABS, further assisted by dual piston calipers with Dynamic Rear Proportioning (DRP).

The sophistication continues inside the much larger cabin. Larger than the original Hummer? If youve ever been in one youd know that this isnt hard. While gargantuan on the outside the H1 is close to claustrophobic from any of its four seats. The H2 on the other hand seats five in base form, while an optional third row seat can increase capacity to six (2/3/1). Why just one more person? The cargo area is partially consumed by the massive spare tire, reducing its capacity almost in half. Still I was able to pick up my 32-inch TV from the repair shop without any difficulty. Fold all the seats forward and total cargo volume achieves 86.6 cubic feet, a phenomenal 28.3 cubic feet larger than the original Hummers 58.3 cubic feet hauling capacity.

The extra room is only half the story. The H2 also improves on the styling and user friendliness of the interior. The dash looks sensational, with giant size air vents set in a metallic finish surface. The larger than life shift lever is leather and also metal finished, and doubles as a convenient armrest - although I dont think that was the intention of the designers. The gauges are beautifully detailed with metal edged bezels and set into a functional rectangular shroud. The H2s seats are large and comfortable with 8-way power adjustment up front and plenty of leg and headroom in back. Luxury features such as dual zone automatic climate control, power windows, power door locks with remote keyless entry, power folding mirrors and a sophisticated driver information center including OnStar in-vehicle communications and assistance service with 1-year Safe & Sound plan come standard.

Options include GMs largest ever glass sunroof, roof equipment and off-road accessories such as the overhead light rack shown in photos. Three options packages start with the previously mentioned Air Suspension Package that adds an off-road suspension, real time dampening, load leveling, manual selectable rear height adjust and an air compressor. The Outdoor Series H2 package includes chrome appearance accents, a double crossbar rack, a brush guard, an AM/FM audio system with a 6-disc in-dash CD changer, tubular taillight covers, a first aid kit, a toolkit with flashlight and leather heated seats. The alternative Adventure Series H2 package includes everything in the aforementioned Outdoor package but the brush guard, first aid kit and toolkit, while exchanging the tubular taillight covers for tubular side steps.

The only fault I could find, other than its rather profound thirst for gasoline, was its interior quality. It looks great and fits together fairly well, except for the drivers side power window switchgear cluster that popped out of the armrest when I tried to raise the window (see photo gallery for evidence), but European car fans wont appreciate the hard, cheap feeling dash and console plastics. That said everything is relative. Compared to the ergonomic nightmare going on inside an H1 it is sublime.

When you sum it up the H2 is eons better than the H1 in every area except off-road prowess. And being that most SUV buyers hardly ever take their vehicles far from paved road surfaces the substantially less expensive H2 makes the most sense. Its by far better looking with much greater functionality and pulls even more eyeballs. And after all, if you buy a bright yellow Hummer that last point has got to matter. Arm candy anyone?