2004 BMW 5 Series Review

Specifications

Slicing Through Thin Air in BMWs Time Machine

I hate to admit it, but not too long ago I actually drove faster than the posted speed. OK, I know what youre thinking. That irresponsible sod disregarding the very laws that make our country a safer place for man, woman and child, how deplorable! I know, Im bad, but I had a good excuse. I was late for an international flight. Of course, this just happened to be due to the fact that I slept past my alarm, ahem.

But then again, it was early in the morning and the streets were almost barren. And I was tempted! Yes, I was tempted by one of the most viperous sirens an import car enthusiast could ever hope to resist, BMWs new 6-speed manual, V8 powered 545i.

OK, now you understand. Am I forgiven? Thank you. The road from my home to the airport starts with a long, straight four-lane boulevard that stretches horizontally across a plateau for a handful of miles, mountains on one side and ocean down the hill a few minutes on the other. Normally the left lane would be occupied by horribly thoughtless daydreamers, moseying along at the speed limit no less, without a care for impatient motorists coming from behind. This morning, however, the roadway was free of such clutter and therefore my pace, commensurate with a need to turn a 45 minute drive into 15, was more brisk.

The lights were in my favor, keeping my nerves less frazzled and velocity constant, the houses and trees whirring by at a decent clip. Passing another green light the road ahead bends to the left and downward as it reaches the end of the plateau, winding circuitously through lush greenery before arriving at a super-sized shopping center - the earmark of suburbia.

Another green light and a sharp turn to the left greet an overpass that spans the highway out of town, a welcome sight after the many stoplights that threatened to thwart my intended purpose. The circular onramp that spirals downward to the right before blending into traffic is one of my favorite high-speed testing facilities, and the 545i eats it up and spits it out like no other car I have tested on it has ever done before - and that number of vehicles my friends is well into the hundreds.

The car has an uncanny balance that belies its rather hefty 3,803 lb curb weight, a miracle of modern engineering really. While BMWs are renowned for their high-speed agility, the modern day 5-Series is in a class of one, annihilating any rival through the curves. This is partially due to the conventional methods of a rigid bodyshell, well-engineered aluminum chassis and suspension, plus large diameter, sticky performance tires, but BMW has taken the new 5 a great leap forward with a full assortment of top-tier technology. The driver aids include the usual BMW fare, including DSC (Dynamic Stability Control) with DTC (Dynamic Traction Control), both among the most revered in their categories, plus runflat tires that come standard with a tire defect indicator. BMW sets the 5 apart with the advent of Active Front Steering, Dynamic Drive and Active Roll Stabilization (ARS). Each is tomorrows technology in todays 5-Series, and their cooperative ability to iron out wrinkled roadways is well beyond an understanding of high school level physics.

Just the same Ill attempt to explain. Essentially active steering adapts the steering ratio to vehicle speed, but its electric-motor-assisted, planetary-gear-motivated rack-and-pinion system is much more sophisticated than conventional speed sensitive steering counterparts, common to luxury cars of all stripes. Steering response to input is much quicker than any other car, at about 1.7 turns lock to lock, making maneuvering into, around and out of tight spaces such as parking lots incredibly easy. To put this in perspective, most cars need about twice that amount to turn the wheel from full left to full right, or about 3.5 turns lock to lock. The reason for this is so steering input isnt too direct at high speeds. At 1.7 turns a car traveling at highway speeds would simply dart off the road with minimal input, not a good thing. Active Steering, however, electronically and mechanically adjusts the ratio to about 4 turns lock to lock when velocities demand, meaning that it is even more stable at high speed than the previous 545i was, and more so than any competitor as well.

And what about Dynamic Drive? It effectually flattens out curves, adjusting to road surface imperfections before the actual heaves and undulations occur. The 545is ride is not only smoother than most competitors sport sedans, but the cars ability to remain horizontal to the road surface and therefore keep as much of the tires contact patch attached to the pavement improves grip and therefore handling.

I couldnt help but chuckle during the spiral onto the highway, so amazed was I at the cars lateral tenacity. But my focus on the job at hand soon resumed, and with it my good ole boy stock car grin immediately soured to Marcus Grönholm-like rally sport concentration. Slipping the buttery smooth 6-speed manual into 3rd gear (a 6-speed manual-mode automatic and 6-speed SMG sequential manual gearbox are also available) I sped onto the freeway, charging to the posted speed and beyond with the flick of the wrist into 4th gear. Fifth gear arrived prior to climbing up and over a 6-lane bridge Ive come to know intimately over the last forty or so years, and before I could say hello its down the other side to the next off-ramp. While the highway looked beckoning I unfortunately wasnt on my way out of town, but rather directly into and across it.

I arrived at Shawn Pisios place in a matter of minutes, the guy who keeps our growing journalistic concern together in more ways even he realizes by the way. Today hes Robin to my Batman impression, and the Batcar is hauling like it never could in Adam Wests day.

Despite now being within the inner city, traffic was still relatively light allowing me to keep up the pace I needed to make my plane. Shawn grabbed the “Oh my!” handle, four of which are conveniently located above each door in all BMWs, expressed a few muffled expletives and finally buckled down for a ride he soon wouldnt forget.

The main arteries throughout the east side of my city are well beyond repair, but fortunately the 545is suspension is much more compliant than I could have previously known, considering I had only just dusted off corner after corner of smoothly paved uptown tarmac. The 5s front seats are also about as perfect as I could have hoped for, having enveloped my backside into soft, comfortable leather, ideally bolstered to impede lateral movement while supporting under the thigh better than the majority in this class.

Shawn turned on the audio system for the traffic report, accessible either via dash mounted controls or the much easier to use second-generation iDrive interface. Even AM stations sound decent on the multi-speaker LOGIC7 audio system, something I enjoyed previously when time was more luxuriously paced.

At this time speed was of the essence, and therefore my route to the airport unfolded before me as predetermined as a rat would circle a maze. Which ever door would open, or in my case whichever light was green became my chosen course. We crisscrossed through town, up main thoroughfares and down side streets, all the while hammering the drive-by-wire throttle, slapping the 6-speed gearbox from cog to cog and plunging down hard on the ABS, EBD and BA assisted 4-wheel disc brakes until we joined up with the 6-laner that terminates at the airport.

One last bridge and onto the flatlands of the delta, we slowed to a crawl as the airport came into sight - the men in blue are aware of crisis management flyers like me, and regularly lie in waiting behind signs and shrubbery that edge up against the final stretch of roadway that leads up to departures.

We pulled to a stop in front of the international terminal, a place Ive come to know like a second home in recent years, with no police cruiser in tow. The 545i was no worse for wear, having been designed to withstand day-in and day-out torture average luxury cars could never hope to endure. I know, as Ive owned a variety of BMWs some of which were 5s, the first which lasted systematic punishment for 260,000 miles without even a valve job before I sold it to a friend. From what I understand its still dishing out thrills to this day, some 15 or so years later.

Im quite sure I would have missed my flight if it werent for the 545i, and the willingness of numberless traffic lights that came to my assistance. Instead Shawn left me at departures and drove it off to a photo session, and I climbed comfortably into my business class cabin.

Life is very good in a 545i, and in my opinion could only get better in the new 507 horsepower V10 equipped 2005 M5. But such is rarified company, the outgoing M5 considered by most automotive journalists, including yours truly as the benchmark sports sedan. With that in mind, Ill be doing very well to stretch my car allowance into a 530i let alone an M5 or 545i, but its healthy to have aspirations.

My trip home from the airport a few days later was much more relaxed, allowing me to reflect on our last drive together. It was as if the car and I went through something extraordinary, a moment of adrenaline inducing angst mixed with feelings of power, control and self-confidence, both having seized the moment and against all odds beaten down the antagonist, and finally, through it all had somehow bonded, man and machine. I think I have to rethink my priorities. It might just be time for another BMW after all.