2008 smart ForTwo Review

Specifications

I once had a girlfriend that owned a massive, black Newfoundland, the biggest, cuddliest, friendliest freight train of an animal you’ve ever seen. It’d shake its head back and forth and you’d think you were amid a Hawaiian rainstorm, but despite drooling all over itself 24/7 it was a true “babe-magnet”, to use a dated and somewhat crass term. I’d walk it down the beach and girls would come running up to see my lovable pooch, begin chatting and, well, I had this girlfriend so it went nowhere, but you get my point. Now, for all it does a mid-40s something married guy, I’ve found the mechanical version of that black Newfoundland, and oddly it’s not the biggest dog in town, but rather the smallest car ever sold in North America, the smart fortwo.

I first experienced this sensation when pulling into a local convenience store in a 2002 smart fortwo, way before the cars went on sale. A crowd quickly formed, often mixed with just as many men as women, but the girls lingered, wanting to know more about this adorable little car. It seems what was good in 2002 in my home town is also good today in San Francisco, as the all-new 2008 smart fortwo experienced the same neck-snapping reaction from passersby in The City as that original 2002 model did.

And for good reason. Not only is it the automotive equivalent of an iPod nano and cuter than an iDog, but it comes in a bevy of bright colors, is more technically advanced than the Air and as stylish as anything else that fruity California computer company makes. Really, if smart doesn’t do a co-op ad with Mac or iPod then there are two agencies that should get fired, and fast. I can see it now. A hip looking Justin Long playing “smart” and John Hodgman as the anthropomorphized “SUV”… it would be brilliant! And smart is targeting that same clientele. Those who would rather die than switch, and won’t let anyone criticize their obviously more intelligent choice no matter how much more they paid for it. And the fortwo isn’t cheap as far as subcompact cars go, slotting in higher than larger four-seat Japanese and Korean subcompacts with more power and greater road-holding capability (albeit fewer standard features). But really PC, you just don’t get it.

Actually, despite my insistence on maintaining my oh-so last-year Dell laptop, warts and all, I do get it. And one drive in the little fortwo will have you in full understanding too. It’s not about how fast it goes, or the lateral Gs it can pull. It’s not about seating capacity and cargo volume either, or looking down at lesser folk driving mere mortal cars as you and your three-ton brute plod your way out of the city into the great wild… as if that ever happens anywhere else but SUV owners’ imaginations. No, it’s about pure efficiency. It’s about taking up less real estate on the road and parking lot, using less foreign oil to commute back and forth to work and therefore producing fewer toxic emissions, and it’s about joining a new and growing awareness that our world isn’t a perpetual energy machine cum Pandora’s box that’ll keep spitting out whatever we ask from it for time and all eternity, without paying a price. Whether you believe in “global warming” or “climate change” or whatever the latest name for what people in my day just referred to as “pollution”, or not (remember that we had a “global cooling” panic about the coming ice age in the mid-‘70s and the “scientists” – yes, some of the same ones hyping up this most recent panic – were ridiculously wrong about that), no rational North American can argue against the need to free ourselves from foreign oil producers that may or may not have similar social/political intentions, or the need to create less smog and therefore breathe easier. And I haven’t even mentioned that greedy capitalist credo “a penny saved is a penny earned,” although a gallon of fuel will set you back more than three bucks now, so that saying really means something today.

But fuel savings and environmental concerns aside, or maybe it’s because of its fuel stingy and environmentally conscious attitude, the smart car has become a global icon for change. Without sounding like I’m attempting to be a Democratic front-runner, the fortwo is all about change. It changes perceptions about what kind of car we really need in order to get the things we need done in a given day… it changes the way we look at performance, from zero to sixty sprints to how long we can go between fill-ups, and it changes what we think about stylish, cool, hip and fun. When you buy into the smart brand you buy into an exclusive club of like-minded people, and within that fresh, clean urban mentality is a unique subculture with its own lifestyle, and its own way of doing things.

I experienced this first hand at the Frankfurt auto show where smart had set up one of the more intriguing show stands of the event, which was more of a chic Euro restaurant/club scene than the traditional showroom floor ambiance most retailers push on their would-be customers. The same attitude trickled down from Europe to a San Francisco showroom that I visited mid-route during the press launch, with the smart brand located upstairs above the traditional Mercedes-Benz dealer, kind of like a funky, outgoing young adult living in the makeshift attic overtop their staid, conservative business-oriented parents’ home (in this case its parents hope their oddly dressed upstart never leaves the nest).

A week later I found myself in LA at the auto show and ran into one of the nicer guys in the auto business, Dave Schembri, who fittingly is now smart’s U.S. president. We initially met over dinner when he was trying to resuscitate Mitsubishi’s North American operations, and each time I’ve seen him since I’ve enjoyed his open, friendly candor and contagious Do It Now attitude… he fits the smart brand well. Dave invited me to join him at the smart house in Venice (Beach, that is), and always ready for some fun I jumped on a shuttle and headed down the highway. We arrived at a nice three-level studio building right on Abbot Kinney Boulevard that smart transformed into a cool gathering place for young urbanites, the kinds of people expected to gravitate to the brand. A short-term location, the smart house opened its doors on October 11th of last year and just closed them on January 25th; almost a four month stint that the brand hopes will have done much to win over locals, many of which will have wandered its ultra-hip halls, enjoyed its retro-modern decor, taken in some of the musical acts, fashion shows, fine arts exhibits and zeitgeist, and most importantly played around with some of the four cars on display inside and even better, temporarily stole one of the fortwos parked out on the street. It’s certainly a different way of selling cars, although I’m sure we’re in agreement that smart is a very different kind of car company. Yes, this is lifestyle marketing at its best.

A week before my evening in Venice, a colleague and I nabbed the keys of a little coupe parked outside our San Jose hotel foyer and began our interurban journey around the city, passing through residential and commercial areas, over multilane highways and across rural-like roads. The 1-liter three-cylinder engine, at 70-horsepower, is motivating enough to feel almost zippy, yet achieves a very reasonable 41 mpg, while the five-speed manu-matic gearbox, which requires a shove to change gears but doesn’t need any fancy footwork, does a good job of swapping cogs in relatively smooth operation, and is even more fun if optional shift-paddles are added. Handling is surprisingly good too, although scrubbing sidewalls isn’t the car’s forte, and on the highway it easily kept up to speed once regulated limits were met, and produced a ride decent enough to leave fillings well in place. The seats are large, comfortable and accommodating, with more room between passengers than the old car, and the new interior layout isn’t quite as quirky as the old model, not available in the US, with fewer alien-like pods protruding from the dash-top, but it’s still unique and filled with unexpected convenience features like a standard leather-wrapped steering wheel and gearshift knob, power windows, power locks with a remote, exterior temperature gauge, intermittent wipers with multiple wiper speeds, intermittent rear wiper with washer, an electric tailgate release, locking gas cap, a flat-folding passenger seat for stowing longer items, numerous additional storage bins and an AM/FM/CD audio system. And I haven’t even started on safety equipment.

Safety is a big consideration when climbing into a car as small as the fortwo, especially for those of us raised during a time when a car’s ability to keep you alive after an accident, not to mention fully functional, was directly related to the amount of thick, chunky metal between you and the outside world. Truly, the little smart car won’t appeal to mass motivated buyers, as there just isn’t much mass to speak of, but let me try and persuade another frame of mind just the same. The paradigm shift comes when considering what has more strength, a large object or small one. In our bigger is better society it’s popular to believe that the full-size SUV is the safest choice in an accident, and compared to some of the tiny tin cans that have passed themselves off as economically-driven transportation in previous years, it’s a reasonable belief. But in the case of the fortwo I want to shake up your belief system; small is actually stronger than large. Consider dropping two objects from a great height, say off the rooftop of Chicago’s 1,105-foot tall, 96-story John Hancock building (yes, I know there are taller, one just across town at 110 stories, but I’ve had dinner at the Signature Room on the 95th floor, so the building just came to mind). Both objects are steel boxes, the one a small military-spec 20mm ammo box, 17¾ inches long by 7½ inches wide by 14½ inches high, and the other a large shipping container, which average 30 by 8 by 8.6 feet (there are larger but this will do). Despite the thicker steel used in the shipping container’s construction, it would flatten with all of its contents sent flying if dropped from a tenth of that height, while the smaller container would survive impact intact, except for dents and scrapes. Briefcase manufacturer Zero Halliburton used to prove this point with TV ads showing one of its aluminum cases being dropped out of an airplane and recovered after the fall, still in one piece. Smart proved its point by showing the greater strength of a short aluminum ladder set on its side and elevated from the ground via two pedestals, and a weaker, longer ladder. The long ladder bent under strain, where the shorter one didn’t give one iota. In the same way, the compact little smart and its ” tridion safety cell” exo-skeletal construction reacts more like an ammo box than a shipping container, maintaining its structural integrity and relying on full-size airbags to reduce the occupant’s rate of speed as much as possible (there is not much in the way of crumple zones to do this task and therefore the delay from initial impact to a complete stop is shorter and more violent). Smart’s safety record in Europe and Canada, where fortwos have been sold for years, is the best evidence, however, with lower rates of serious injury or death than other compact cars.

In addition to its rigid construction and those full-size airbags, the fortwo comes standard with head/thorax side airbags, specially designed safety seats, seatbelt pretensioners, and for staying clear of accidents in the first place, a hydraulic dual-circuit braking system enhanced with ABS and electronic brake force distribution, plus ESP electronic stability control to keep it pointed in the right direction in slippery situations. It even has hill start control so that you don’t roll back when taking off from a steep grade (the sequential manual transmission acts much like a manual when starting off).

For those who don’t quite feel safe enough in the base “pure” car, smart offers an alarm system at $160, front fog lamps for enhanced forward vision at $110, plus electric power steering for quicker steering response at $450. Additional convenience items include automatic climate control with pollen filtration at $600, a tachometer and clock integrated into the instrument panel for $120, heated seats at $220, and a panoramic sunroof with a sunscreen at $350… and lest I forget, three shades of metallic paint (red, blue and silver) for $225; it’s an impressive list of standalone options. Oh, and incidentally the fortwo can be had in non-metallic colors too, including deep black, light yellow and crystal white.

Smart obviously ranks carnal lust higher on the pecking order than puritan moral code, as the “passion” is valued greater than the “pure”. OK, I suppose a person can be passionate about purity, or anything else for that matter, but as far as the fortwo goes it’s merely a clever model name designating their top-of-the-line hardtop. Along with the palpitation inducing name, $13,665 will buy you everything the pure comes standard with plus the panoramic glass sunroof that’s optional on the base car, alloy wheels, automatic climate control, powered and heated side mirrors, electric power steering, heated seats, and an upgraded audio system with a six-disc, in-dash CD changer, auxiliary plug for an external device, plus more speakers including a subwoofer. This stereo sounds great too. Projector beam halogen headlamps are also part of the passion package, and the tridion safety cell gets painted silver for a sportier look, enhanced by 9-spoke, 15-inch alloy rims wrapped in 155/60 R15 front and 175/55 R15 rear tires. Additionally, the passion gets a three-spoke steering wheel with those aforementioned paddle-shifters fixed to the steering column.

Only a short list of options are available with the passion, and include the alarm system, fog lamps, clock, rev counter and metallic paint, also optional on the base car, plus leather seats at $850 (as part of the Comfort package) and the ability to get the tridion safety cell in gloss black (standard on the pure), at no charge.

Highest on the pecking order is the fortwo passion cabriolet, which, as it sounds, includes everything the coupe comes with plus a nifty little removable cloth roof, all for $18,230. And this isn’t just any retractable soft-top, as it powers back in infinite stages, becoming a large sunroof at first, or an extremely large one if rolled all the way to the rear of the vehicle, easily done while parked or driving at top-speed. Then again, if you want the full cabriolet treatment, the side roof bars can be removed and stowed in a handy compartment hidden within the fold-down tailgate, while the roof folds rearward in a traditional convertible “bundle” out back. Rear visibility is hampered a bit, but during our tour of a balmy Bay Area I certainly never felt compromised when changing lanes. The roof pops back into place easily when you’re done with the sun, and there’s even a heated glass rear window for colder days.

We eventually reached our lunch spot, the Computer History Museum on Shoreline Blvd, where smart had a few concepts and early prototypes on display, plus the tiniest hors d’oeuvres and teensiest little hamburgers ever made… yes, the smart lifestyle is all about efficiency in design, even when eating.

After lunch and a short tour of the facility, which, being middle aged was often like being reacquainted with a long lost friend (my once state-of-the-art and extremely portable Mac Classic was on display… with substantially less computing power than the fortwo’s ECU), we headed over the Bay Bridge and into The City, and then all over the place for no reason other than to clock as many miles as possible during the day’s drive, and, on occasion, arrive at a picture perfect photo op. Again, once we got out of the car and readied camera gear a small crowd would gather, ripe with curiosity, spouting questions with an almost contagious enthusiasm. I almost was embarrassed for them… I mean, grown men reduced to gushing, as if they were blubbering grandmas trying to hold themselves back from pinching the fortwo’s cheeks between thumb and forefinger.

The car just begs to be personified, much like VW’s Beetle or Fiat’s new 500. Of course it’s started to show up in films like The Da Vinci Code and The Pink Panther, but so far no one’s tried to turn it into a modern-day Herbie or created a cartoon series around it. Although I certainly felt an affinity with the car when our day ended, wishing I could throw a leash on it and go for a walk down Baker Beach (not the north end, of course… wouldn’t want to make the little guy uncomfortable), if one were to end up on my garage I could certainly see my kids naming it like we did with my Dad’s ‘66 Bug. Truly, if smart wants to take automotive marketing to an entirely new level, every fortwo should come with its own Webkinz-like online world where owners could feed and care for a virtual version. But I digress. It’s just that smart car ownership reportedly can become a more fulfilling experience than merely buying a conventional car.

From what I understand, new 2008 models have started arriving in dealerships across the nation and those that haven’t already been scooped up are awaiting adoption. Will that early adopter be you? While a fortwo won’t fit everyone’s lifestyle, it might be an ideal fit for yours. Try one on for size, and get ready for parking lot gatherings of curious onlookers. The smart fortwo is truly a shift in lifestyle.